When your teen is hurting themselves or thinking about suicide.
Maybe you found marks they’d been hiding, or a message you can’t stop thinking about. Maybe they told you, flatly, that they don’t see the point anymore. You’ve been checking on them at night and choosing every word carefully, afraid of saying the wrong thing. You don’t have to figure this out alone, and it is more treatable than it feels right now.
Call or text 988 for the Suicide & Crisis Lifeline, or call 911. We are not a crisis service and cannot respond to emergencies.
How therapy helps
The right therapy gives your teen something to do in the hardest moments besides hurting themselves, and gives your family a plan.
- Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT). Weekly individual therapy plus a weekly skills group, focused on getting through intense moments without self-harm. DBT for adolescents is one of the few treatments shown in randomized trials to reduce self-harm and suicide attempts in teens.
- CAMS. The Collaborative Assessment and Management of Suicidality works with your teen directly on what is driving their suicidal thoughts, rather than only managing risk.
- A safety plan you both know. Your teen writes a plan for hard moments: warning signs, what helps, and who to reach. We go over the parts that involve you.
- Support for parents. What to say, what to avoid, and practical steps that make home safer, like locking up medications and firearms.
This tends to fit if
- You’ve found signs your teen is hurting themselves, and they won’t talk about it.
- They’ve said they don’t want to be alive, or you’ve seen it in something they wrote.
- They were recently in the ER or hospital and need ongoing care.
- Their emotions swing hard and fast, and self-harm has become how they cope.
- Past therapy helped for a while, then stopped helping.
Every teen is different, and you don’t need to match a description to reach out.
Why families come to us
Patrick Phelan, LMHC, is intensively trained in DBT and trained in CAMS, and teens and young adults with self-harm and suicidal thoughts are the center of his practice. He is the only in-network comprehensive DBT provider for teens on Vashon Island with Premera and Regence.
There’s no long waitlist. Most new clients have a first appointment within 5 business days, and urgent needs are usually seen within 48 hours.
Teens are seen in person on Vashon Island and by telehealth anywhere in Washington, including Seattle. DBT skills groups run through our partner, Columbia City DBT.
Questions parents ask
Will talking about self-harm or suicide make it worse?
No. Research consistently finds that asking someone directly about suicidal thoughts does not plant the idea or raise their risk. For many teens, being asked plainly is a relief. Therapy gives that conversation structure and a plan.
Will you tell me what my teen says?
Teens 13 and older in Washington can consent to their own outpatient mental health care, and most of what they share stays private. That privacy is part of what makes therapy work. Before we start, we agree as a family on what gets shared with you. If we believe your teen’s safety is at risk, we will tell you.
My teen won’t admit anything is wrong. Can you still help?
Often, yes. DBT starts by finding out what your teen wants for their own life and tying the work to that. The free consultation is a low-pressure first step, and you can book it as a parent.
Should we go to the ER instead?
If your teen is in immediate danger, call 911 or go to the nearest emergency room, and you can call or text 988 any time. We’re not a crisis service. Therapy is for the weeks and months that follow, including after an ER visit or hospital stay.
How long does treatment take?
DBT is usually a six to twelve month commitment. Teens who complete a full course tend to do better than those who stop early, so we’ll talk about what that commitment looks like before you start.
Does insurance cover this?
Individual therapy is covered by the plans we’re in network with: Premera, Regence, LifeWise, and most Blue Cross Blue Shield plans. We’ll check your benefits and go over the cost of the skills group at your consultation.
Get started
Talk with us about your teen.
Request a time on our calendar for a phone or video call, and we’ll confirm it. It’s a chance to ask questions and see whether we’re a good fit, with no commitment either way.
Most new clients have a first appointment within 5 business days. We reply to calls, texts, and emails within one business day.
Prefer email? hello@understorytherapygroup.com. Please leave symptoms and health history out of email; we’ll cover that on the call.